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 Forum index » Off Topic » Raven's Room


What's your preference?
 
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What's Your Preference?
Heterosexual (straight)
71%
 71%  [ 64 ]
Homosexual (gay/lesbian)
1%
 1%  [ 1 ]
Bisexual (prefers both)
26%
 26%  [ 24 ]
Total Votes : 89

Author Message
DragonShadow
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Joined: 01 Aug 2004
Posts: 2,356

PostPosted: Thu Apr 10, 2008 5:38 am  Reply with quote

This happens to everyone. We have ways we're taught to think depending on who we're around, and how we act around different people changes depending on who we're with. Examples...

You do not act the same way around a teacher that you would a friend, because you believe the nature of the relationships between the two are different.

You don't act the same way around your boy/girlfriend that you do around your siblings. Not just in how polite or restrained you are, but your entire thought processes can change.

You don't treat your parents the same as your siblings/friends.

The list goes on and on and on. The point here is that you probably just see the sexes differently, and different traits come out of YOU as a result of this percieved difference. You see women as more passive and gentle while you see men as more aggressive and commanding. This is a position a lot of Americans subconsciously hold, and it drives femenists INSANE, but that's just how the mind works sometimes.

Another example is even men can be loving and gentle, almost submissive toward their girlfriends and wives, and then go out drinking with their buddies acting like a hyperaggressive asshole toward anyone who looks at them funny. It's the change in their mindset toward the people they're with that changes their behavior.

It also has to do with your perceptions of what is expected of you from each gender (women expect you to be dominant while men expect you to be submissive, perhaps?) I can't say exactly why you in particular are like this, because people do it for different reasons and in different degrees, but it's a common human psychological trait.

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Amadeus
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Joined: 06 Feb 2006
Posts: 1,103
Location: I wish it would snow here...

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 3:06 am  Reply with quote

ChibiKain wrote:
Thread necromancy ftw.

I have an interesting question, so I guess it'll make this bump worthwhile. As mentioned already, I'm bi. I dated a girl before, but it ended terribly (not gonna go into details here), and now I'm engaged to a guy. What I've been wondering is that my "position," so to speak, kinda fluctuates depending on which gender I'm with. By that I mean that I'm with a woman, whether it's one that I'm dating or otherwise, I get this urge to be more assertive, protective, and possibly even more dominant. But when I'm with a man, I'm much more passive and apathetic.

If this was just regarding my past and present SOs, one could point to age since the chick was younger than me and my man is a little older, but I've noticed that this seems to apply to everyone I come into contact with. So I'm asking for someone's two cents on what this could possibly mean.

In addition to Dragonshadow's take on it, it's possible that you're filling the role in the relationship that is left empty. Maybe the men you're with are typically more assertive with you.
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Amaigirl
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Joined: 26 Jul 2004
Posts: 1,225
Location: New York

PostPosted: Wed Apr 13, 2011 6:51 pm  Reply with quote

I actually always, always considered myself heterosexual until about the last year. Now, I'm somewhat in the grey area between that and bisexual.

Honestly, though, I'm not sure if my interest in women is predominantly aesthetic. I have zero experience with women, but I would be more than willing to try (assuming I find an eager attractive one). I've always found the female form much more beautiful and visually appealing than the male, though now I think it might be bordering on sexual attraction.

OR, maybe I should blame anime. *sigh*
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